c r o s s+r o a d s

Men's Emotional Weakness (?)

When male colleagues encouraged me to watch "Blue Moon", I said... I came from "bagets" generation not "starstruck". Not that I don't watch local movies, but I think I may be too old for the "kilig" stuffs. Nevertheless, I was left wondering why friends of my age and even older have high regard for the movie.

When I had the opportunity to visit and to audit our Mall's compliance to HR standards, I took time to check the movie... Though, I only saw the scene wherein three generations of men-- grand dad, daddy and son, are arguing-- having relationship problems with each other, they also have one common problem-- handling the loss of a relationship and the woman they love, it encouraged me to watch the movie.



So the following day, January 25, my wife and I had a date.... While watching, I played with my cell phone once in a while, so I'll not get carried over and cry like the rest. Boy, I struggled to keep my tears in control.
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Men are generally thought as the culprit for the woes of women. While the notion has a seed of truth, the lack of fatherly image in our society contributes to the problem. Most kids have a father in absentia-- either their dads are OFWs or parents are separated or the father is a gold plated jerk. Leaving the sons either having a wrong model or outrightly no role model of a "lover", "husband" and "dad".

It is true that men can cause a woman to cry, but there are also substantial share of "tears brought by joy"...
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Back to the movie, it made me value three relationships in my life-- with my dad, my 9 year old son Elhav, and, of course, my wife.

The movie is not perfect, but it promotes respect for marriage, love for the beloved till the end, and what I liked the most, it promotes transparency between father and son.

A common problem of men is his ability to open up and communicate with each other. Especially on matters of the heart.

Another problem is the tendency of men to focus too much on his career, focus too much on his role to provide, but in the process, ignore the very reason why he is working-- his family.

Men are also emotional being, but unlike women, men lack the mechanism to handle the loss or apparent break-up of a relationship. While women can talk about it, men, generally, will not. Thus, the tendency to be off balanced and worse, forget the other significant people in his life.
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My wife and I are able to catch the last full show after a busy wednesday schedule. We entered the movie house holding each other's hand... and left the theater with my arms on her shoulder while hers is on my hips...

The movie is a good shot in the arm.

posted by ASKSonnie @ Monday, January 30, 2006